THERE'S MORE THAN ONE TYPE OF ABUSE

​ECONOMIC ABUSE:

Economic or financial abuse is when an abusive partner extends their power and control into the area of finances. This abuse can take different forms, including an abusive partner:

• Giving an allowance and closely watching how you spend it or demanding receipts for purchases
• Placing your paycheck in their bank account and denying you access to it
• Preventing you from viewing or having access to bank accounts
• Forbidding you to work or limiting the hours that you can work
• Maxing out credit cards in your name without permission or not paying the bills on credit cards, which could ruin your credit score
• Stealing money from you or your family and friends
• Using funds from children’s savings accounts without your permission
• Living in your home but refusing to work or contribute to the household
• Making you give them your tax returns or confiscating joint tax returns
• Refusing to give you money to pay for necessities/shared expenses like food, clothing, transportation, or medical care and medicine
• Blackmailing you into staying by threatening to take away funds for you, or you and your family/children

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EMOTIONAL ABUSE:

You may be in an emotionally abusive relationship if you partner exerts control through: 

• Calling you names, insulting you or continually criticizing you
• Refusing to trust you and acting jealous or possessive
• Trying to isolate you from family or friends
• Monitoring where you go, who you call and who you spend time with
• Demanding to know where you are every minute
• Punishing you by withholding affection
• Threatening to hurt you, the children, your family or your pets
• Humiliating you in any way
• Blaming you for the abuse
• Gaslighting (making you question your own feeling and sanity)
• Accusing you of cheating and being often jealous of your outside relationships
• Serially cheating on you and then blaming you for his or her behavior
• Cheating on you intentionally to hurt you and then threatening to cheat again
• Cheating to prove that they are more desired, worthy, etc. than you are
• Attempting to control your appearance: what you wear, how much/little makeup you wear, etc.
• Telling you that you will never find anyone better, or that you are lucky to be with a person like them

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PHYSICAL ABUSE:

You may be experiencing physical abuse if your partner has used or repeatedly used any of the following tactics of abuse:

• Pulling your hair, punching, slapping, kicking, biting or choking you
• Forbidding you from eating or sleeping
• Damaging your property when they’re angry (throwing objects, punching walls, kicking doors, etc.)
• Using weapons to threaten to hurt you, or actually hurting you with weapons
• Trapping you in your home or keeps you from leaving
• Preventing you from calling the police or seeking medical attention
• Harming your children
• Abandoning you in unfamiliar places
• Driving recklessly or dangerously when you are in the car with them
• Forcing you to use drugs or alcohol (especially if you’ve had a substance abuse problem in the past)

WHAT IS A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP?

THE FACTS:

• A woman is beaten every 15 seconds. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Report to the Nation on Crime and Justice.)
• Ninety-five percent of the victims of domestic violence are women. (Violence Against Women, June 1992, The National Women's Health Resource Center.)
• Domestic Violence is the leading cause of injury to women between the ages of 15 and 44 in the United States -- more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined. (Uniform Crime Reports, Federal Bureau of Investigation, 1991.)
• As many as one-quarter to two -thirds of battered women report abuse during pregnancy. (Violence Against Women, June 1992, The National Women's Health Resource Center.) Battered women are more likely to suffer miscarriages and to give birth to babies with low birth weights. (Surgeon General, United States, 1992.
• Sixty-three percent of the young men between the ages of 11 and 20 who are serving time for homicide have killed their mother's abuser. (March of Dimes, 1992.) 
• Women of all cultures, races, occupations, income levels, and ages are battered -- by husbands, boyfriends, lovers, and partners. (Surgeon General Antonia Novello, as quoted in Domestic Violence: Battered Women, a publication of the Reference Dept. of the Cambridge Public Library, Cambridge, MA.)  
• One in five women victimized by their spouses or ex-spouses report they had been victimized over and over again by the same person. (The Basics of Batterer Treatment, Common Purpose, Inc., Jamaica Plain, MA.)  
• Battering is the establishment of control and fear in a relationship through violence and other forms of abuse. The batterer uses acts of violence and a series of behaviors, including intimidation, threats, psychological abuse, isolation, etc. to coerce and control the other person. The violence may not happen often, but it remains as a hidden (and constant) terrorizing factor. (Uniform Crime Reports, Federal Bureau of Investigation, 1990.

National Domestic Violence Fact Sheet

Wisconsin Domestic Violence Fact Sheet

Sexual Assault Fact Sheet

For local referrals and confidential counseling, please call New Day Advocacy Center at 715-682-9565 or toll free 1-800-924-4132, or call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233).​